Viddy and Jessica

Monday, February 21, 2011

Viddy and the Three Bees

I know you've heard of goldilocks and the three bears... Well I think bees are worse than bears.
Last week I had a bout of the flu and was pretty sick and slept a lot. Also, the weather in Tucson was so ridiculously beautiful. These two factors were the main contributors of this horror version of a children's story.
Once upon a time there was a lowly graduate student who had been overworked and was feeling fatigued. One of his evil students brought with them something to class, something he never expected and something that he would later regret that he was unprepared to deal with: The plague that is more commonly called the flu.
His health was destroyed and he was quickly confined to his bed. The same bed that was not too soft and not too hard, but just right. Feeling that fresh air would help his horrible condition he decided to abandon safety and leave his bedroom window open. Little did he know that would cost him dearly and he would regret his desire to breath the clean crisp air outside of his house.
Feeling low on fluids he went to get himself a drink and with a full glass of water he got back into bed. Just getting from the kitchen and back to the room had cost him all of his energy and he was ready to get back to bed. As he pulled his comforter up to keep himself warm the first of the three bees struck with violence untamed. The blanket had apparently pulled a bee across the poor, unsuspecting man's arm where the bee suicidally tried to poison the man. Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you look at it; The comforter was to heavy and the bee's aim to far off for deep penetration, although the man felt the poison begin to enter his body and found the now dying bee in bed with him.
He thought to himself, "How dare he get in bed with me, how dare he attack me in my hour of sickness, and how dare he leave me more wounded than before." He then mustered enough energy to finalize the suicidal bees intentions and quickly brought death where he thought it was deserved.
As he lay back down, with heightened senses that can only be cause by increasing pain, he heard a soft buzzing sound and quickly brought out of his stupor and back on the defensive. The second bee was smarter than the first and flew to the lamp instead of remaining in bed with the infirmed fellow. The lamp was not far enough away though for the man's anger had been kindled and all who sought to hurt him would be challenged and claimed if possible. The man quickly found and shoe and tried to hit the bee sitting on the lampshade...He may have hit the bee, and he surely hit the lampshade hard enough to leave a foot shaped hole in it. The bee was either immobilized from fear or possibly from some slight damage that had been done to him, so the man quickly removed the lampshade and threw it out the window.
Tired from the exertion and from the now increasing pain the man again decided to go to bed. He was then visited by the third bee! That bee only came to tease and landed on the pillow next to his. Little that that bee understand that so exhausted at this point the man hadn't even let go of the shoe when he had gotten into bed and the price for teasing the man was the poor bee's life.
Finally, fearing there would be a greater influx of insects the man went and slept on the couch.
The question you must ask is was the man really so out of it, or so fatigued that he didn't think to himself, "Maybe I should shut the window?"...after the first bee attacked him